WHERE TO?

03/08/25 (Saturday)

hi!! this is my very first blog post. how exciting!

I've been having an awesome time. yesterday I saw one of my best friends in a musical! it was super fun. I went with a mutual friend of ours, and we picked up flowers + a monster for him because he's addicted to caffeine. how fun. when we got there, I saw some friends I hadn't seen in forever so we sat with them and caught up and whatnot. the friend I had in the show said he could see the flash of my camera. oops... I didn't even get any good pictures to embarrass him with, either.

today was rad too. I hung out with my musical pal because we haven't seen each other in a while (+ another mutual friend of ours). we made some stuff out of dollar store clay, got a coffee(? it might have just been chai actually) that tasted like the christmas section of a walmart, and played uno in the most incredible (and safe... sarcasm) hangout spot I've ever seen. gotta keep it in mind for this summer... anyways musical guy won uno who cares he probably cheated I don't even care it's just a game...... they also got some beanie babies at our FAVORITE (!!!!!!) antique store because they have a crap ton of them for just 2 bucks each. I think I have like 5 already so I didn't get any new ones haha. anyways at the risk of sounding incredibly attention seeking, I hate it when people only tell the best parts of their lives online, so yeah I did end up dissociating really badly + went home early. and then I coded this wonderful page and wrote this!!!! everyone say thank you cal for scowering the interwebs for how to code those tabs up there!!! shoutout my friends for being very nice and cool and understanding about my genuinely awful stinky anxiety. they're real ones fr. I also demolished two oranges earlier while catching up on youtube stuff. very peak night activities. ok bye I need to pass out I've been up for everrrrrr goodnight.

03/26/25 (Wednesday)

ohmygod this blog page needs a new layout so bad this physically pains me to look at. but i'm gonna finish the homepage first. honestly not even sure what i'd change about this page it's so. ugh.

anyways i fear my blog posts will make it painfully clear that I only leave my house like once a week for guitar lessons (thats a huge lie i do actually have a life) so uhhh. anyways i went to guitar lessons the other day and the place i go to is also a record store (peak selection btw i got some tv girl records there a few weeks ago and i'm saving up for another) and there was a stack of free posters wahoo!!! so i grabbed one, but it's double sided and both sides are so cool. how could they do this to me. there were also two other posters with artists i've never heard of but that won't stop me from getting them next week. ughhhhh also i got a sublime record there like a million bajillion years ago and its so nasty you really can't even listen to it (cough definitely not because I didn't know how to clean it... cough...) and i've been meaning to bring it in but i keep forgetting. someone remind me to bring it next week (talking to a wall)

umm in other news. gonna get real here for a sec. I used to have a sort of situationship?? not sure if you could even call it that. it was psychological warfare. BUT good news is i've moved on!!! insert that one picture of the person breaking the handcuffs infront of a sunset. i'm over it!!! i do not want to date anybody ever because i'm way too cool. anyways i wanted to share with the class because I'm proud of myself OK MOVING ON.... throws up

the splort brainrot is back. the splotch. the squitch. i thought it was gone for good. aughhh hes taking over my brain in a sinister way!!!!!!!1 its every summer that it kicks in i swear (ignore the fact that its spring). I was planning on making a spiderverse shrine because obviously, but then i realized it would probably just be him and gwen cause they're my favorites. AND NOIR........ my beloved. but umm yeah i can't wait for the next movie to drop so people will finally remember that loser because all the fanfics about him are from 2023 and it makes me sad. insert a really good segway

i'm getting into digital art!!! i got procreate on my ipad a while ago and forgot about it but i'm back on that grind now. i'm working on some style studies on there right now woohoo!! nobody's surprised that one of them is of arcane. my goal is to improve my art before i start my next sketchbook, and i'm almost done with my current one, which i think is almost two years old?? maybe like one and a half. its literally unc. but yeah if that says anything about how motivated i am to draw... half of it isn't even drawing its just scrapbooking. like would it kill you to draw. an eye. I never draw cause i'm like "oh it won't look good, i don't even have an art style.." THEN?? GET ONE????? ugh so i started studying anatomy. and i mean studying as in like. the loosest of terms. just figure drawings mostly but thats fine.

okok i'm done procrastinating i have to go work now. sigh off to the mines i go. puts on a hardhat and grabs a comically large pickaxe and walks away slowly hanging my head. bye bye!!!!!

03/29/25 (Saturday)

how come these blog posts are getting longer and longer each time i post...

greetings once more. yes this is the best thing i have to do on this lovely saturday. i lovelovelove posting on here but i was like "oh no i shouldn't post stuff too quickly people will get annoyed" but then i realized idgaf. like thats literally why i made my website in the first place... so i can be annoying... plus i love when people i follow post stuff frequently. so ummmm yeah heres another absurdly long blog post!!!!

as you can probably tell, i'm SO burnt out on coding. everything that's been done on this site so far was done in the span of like. a few weeks if i'm not mistaken. which if you're super good at coding, that probably wouldn't be a big deal, but i'm learning as i go, so it was just a lot to be doing. i do have to say though, this is one of those instances where i'm really glad i'm not going to public school anymore (i'm homeschooled. gets hit in the face with a tomato) because I was able to dedicate so much time to learning a new hobby, especially something as complicated as coding. so yay win!!!

speaking of homeschooling though... i went homeschooled fairly recently, like december i believe. halfway through the school year... which was totally rad... (lying) but i'm glad it happened when it did because i had gym 2nd semester and that's like actual torture for someone with severe anxiety. i was also getting like semi-bullied? nobody was really consistently making fun of me to my face but nearly everybody made it pretty clear that they didn't like me. such are the consequences of being really cool, i guess... just kidding its because i'm a queer person in an overwhelmingly republican small town. which isn't to say that i don't have any support system or anything, because i do, but it just got way too overwhelming to go to the place where so many people hate me 5 days a week and be expected to do well there. (edit: this makes it sound like i was a huge loser LOL and i know it sounds like i'm lying now but i do have lots of friends. lots of weed smoking girlfriends too /ref)

anyways. i'm thinking a lot about my future, and i'm really excited. this might out me as a stinky little minor but i've never really had any idea what i want to do when i'm out of highschool. not a solid one, at least. i thought maybe i'd be like, an author or artist of some sort, but that doesn't seem realistic anymore unfortunately. fun fact, my 4th grade teacher said the big ass NOVEL that i wrote for class (for some reason? we didn't have to write that much LMAO) had him on the edge of his seat. that single comment has been the source of my writing ego since. i really want to start writing on ao3 but i'm afraid my parents will see what else is on that hellsite and not let me. that makes me sound like a toddler. no my parents just don't want me getting groomed or whatever. which is. valid. but anyways yeah i think i want to pursue computer science-y stuff in college. or maybe film?? i've always been into the behind-the-scenes of entertainment.

another thing i'm thinking about regarding my future is medically transitioning. i can't remember if i've mentioned it anywhere on here, but i'm trans! how fun. if anyone knows any nice trans-friendly countries to move to please lmk LMAO. i plan on getting out of america asap once i'm done with school and everything. but anyways a well known fact about me is that i'm fucking PETRIFIED of needles. i've tried literally everything. i remember when i had to get whatever shots before i went into 8th grade and i was literally doing like therapy on myself to be ok (spoiler: it did not work) and looking back, it literally wasn't even that bad. it didn't hurt at all, and one of the shots i had to get was like, for tetanus or something?? idk everyone was talking about how big the needle was and how bad it hurt. but it only hurt afterwards lol. but phobias aren't rooted in facts so whatever. i'm still scared of needles. stupid ape brain.

oh but back on topic. obviously you can see how being afraid of needles is going to absolutely blow when i start my transition. i don't plan on doing t as an injection, i've seen they have like gel stuff or whatever other alternatives, so i'll probably just do those. i was going to add that i'm scared of surgeries as well, but i'm not really scared of surgery itself, just the needles involved haha. so recovering from top surgery will be my BIGGEST nightmare. but i plan on getting some piercings as a kind of exposure therapy i guess? i also think the purpose of the needles will soften the blow a bit, because ultimately it's only helping me out. sorry this might be a tad tmi haha.

ummmm in my last blog post i mentioned finally being over that situationship... which sucks. crushes are so fun (unless they're like the dude that i liked. no hate he's just insane) so now i'm just really bored. and it's kind of the most difficult thing ever to meet new people since i went homeschooled (audience boos) but theres a punk show i can hopefully go to next month so maybe i'll make some friends there.

ugh omg the yappinator over here. but this is my website so i'll talk about whatever i want. sorry this is so long though. bye hope you have a nice rest of ur weekend!!!!!!

04/01/25 (Tuesday)

HIIIIII!!!!!!

ok I'm seriously so proud of myself with this page. I literally did this in TWO DAYS... unheard of. for me atleast because I suck at coding in a big way. but anyways. LOOK AT MY COOL NEW FONT!!!!!! it took forever because apparently I've never used a computer before???? and I had SO much fun making the little gif of my journal opening... thats my real desk!!!!!! also you can't really tell because I had to crop it, but thats snoopy in the top left haha. also happy april fools!!!

ok this morning I had a bagel with cream cheese for breakfast and its the happiest I've ever been. it was so fire. and last night I grabbed some more of those free posters, and I also got a free pin!!! I love free stuff. I put the pin on my little snoopy.

ummm not much else to talk about, just wanted to add something here in honor of the new blog page!!! woohoo!!!!!!!! everyone say congratulations to me RIGHT NOW. ok byeee!!!!!!! :D

heres an image. for your troubles